RAF MILDENHALL, England -- With the intent of providing a support and social network, the 100th Force Support Squadron Airman and Family Readiness Center recently started a single parents' support group.

After a 352nd Special Operations Group parent enquired as to whether such a group existed, Kevin Carrico, 100th FSS A&FRC community readiness specialist, immediately looked into getting one started for her and other single parents around RAF Mildenhall.

Open to military and civilians, Carrico said the goal of the group is to share parental lessons learned, as well as resources and knowledge, and eventually help each other with childcare, therefore providing a much-needed break.

The group can assist those whose lives have reached   The Turning Point.
 
"We hope that those attending the group will offer each other support and encouragement," Carrico said. "Sometimes people just need a chance to vent, and this is a forum to do that. I will provide assistance where necessary, and occasionally bring in topics for discussion that single parents encounter on a regular basis, such as stress."

Meetings will be held at the Bob Hope Community Center, to provide a relaxed and informal atmosphere.

The aim is also to keep the group focused on the parents' needs.

"I've been a single parent for the last 12 years," said Master Sgt. Rebecca Bustillos, 352nd Special Operations Group. "My job in aircraft maintenance requires me to be available to work shifts from 2 to 11 p.m. or 10 p.m. to 8 a.m. It also requires me to go (on temporary duty). My kids are teenagers, and old enough to stay by themselves when I work the off-shifts, but not old enough to stay alone when I go TDY.

"I initially wanted to find out if there was a single or military-to-military parents' support group here, as a resource for helping me find people willing to watch my kids during TDYs," she said.

"When coming to a new base - especially one overseas - some single and (military-to-military) parents lost the support network they had for caring for their kids during shift work or TDYs," said Bustillos. They are expected to take care of personal responsibilities and be ready for duty. But it's very challenging when they don't know anyone, and there are no family members nearby to help out."

Bustillos said she feels there's definitely a need for a group such as this.

"There's always single and (military-to-military) parents who are in the same or similar situation to me," she said. "They may not be PCSing into RAF Mildenhall; they may have been here a while and are new to single parenting because of divorce, medical issues or long-term deployment or a spouse. But there needs to be an organized resource for single and (military-to-military) parents to turn to, in an effort to mitigate the unique challenges we face."

The newly reformed single parents' support group fits the bill for what Bustillos and others in similar situations are after, and she said that having the group means multiple benefits.

"It's an opportunity to talk to someone who truly understands the issues single and (military-to-military) parents face," Bustillos said. "You can talk to your friends, peers and your supervisor all day long, but if they haven't walked in your shoes, they don't truly understand what it's like being a single parent in the military."

Military parents, both single and military-to-military, are required to have a family care plan in-place in case they have to deploy. This requires that they have at least one person outside their family, either military or civilian, that will look after their children should the need arise.

Often it may be the case where the person named on the family care plan hasn't known the military member very long, such as if either person as recently arrived at the base.

Another person who plans on attending the group meetings is Master Sgt. Virginia King, 352nd SOG. Although married, King is on an assignment here as a single parent, due to medical restrictions not allowing her husband to accompany her.

King said she's met several parents, both single and otherwise, who profess to be overprotective.

"I think the support group will not only bring single parents together so we can share our struggles and solutions, but because the A&FRC is involved, it will help solve some of the issues that come up, that are addressed in other programs but are not applicable to single parents."

The next single parents' support group meeting is scheduled for June 8, from noon to 1 p.m. at the Bob Hope Community Center. Thereafter, the meetings will be held the last Friday of each month. For more information, call Carrico at DSN 238-3406.

Editor's note: The Turning Point is a recurring series which will culminate later this summer. Look for part 3 of The Turning Point on www.mildenhall.af.mil and www.facebook.com/RAFMildenhall soon.